Unforgettable Lines

O M G. I will never forget (and unable to forget) those lines…which happened to have came out of my Goddess’ mouth. They’re hilarious and 100% true.

Shanghai Kiss

Setting – An Americanese just got back to Shanghai from the US. He knows nothing about his culture and language…went to a bar and encountered my Goddess.

Liam: Hi

Micki: Hi

Liam: I’m Liam

Micki: Miki

Liam: You speak english?

Micki: You speak German?

Liam: Why would I speak German? We’re not in Germany.

Micki: Why would I speak English? We’re not in England.

Liam: Because everybody speaks english.

Micki: If that is true…then why even ask in the first place???

In Case Of Emergency (One of the best series I’ve seen that they cancelled -_-’)

Setting – My Goddess brought her friend, Sherman, to a strip club…hoping to get him over his wife.

Sherman: I’m not dead inside like you.

*Kelly gave a pissed look and turns around*

Sherman: I…I’m sorry. I mean…you’re not alive inside.

*Kelly gave that same look again*

Sherman: I didn’t make it better, did I?

Kelly Lee: No. Look…I’m not dead inside…it’s just that I think the world is a living hell…and it’s a sick demon who runs it.

Devil’s Den

Setting – Goddess and that ugly guy just ran off a whole bunch of flesh-eating-monsters.

Caitlin: *fast breathing* Just give me a minute…alright? *heavy breathing continues*

Quinn: What…are you tired?

*desperate look from Caitlin*

Quinn: Coz…I mean…we haven’t ran very far.

Caitlin: Look. I hate running…alright?

Quinn: Okay. I’m just saying…you know…tough girl like you…

Caitlin: …Isn’t usually the one doing the runnning.

Quinn: Yeah. Alright. Point taken.

Farm House

Setting: Samael and his wife, Lilith (Goddess), in front of their stupid guests.

*presenting a toast*

Samael: Make the best day of your past…the worst in the future.

Lilith: No honey. It’s make the worst day of your past…the best in the future.

BRIIIILLIANT………………………………………………….